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fifth april.

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let's chase the summer and forget the world.

hey:)

its 12plus am right now and almost everyone's offline already.. and i still cant get off the com. oh well, shall blog :) anywayyy OP is over. yeay. okay happy happy, except for the fact that i kinda screwed up my q&a it was quite horrible i was feeling quite angry and irritable, i know the horrid feeling will pass soon but i really dont want to get a lousy grade for my pw :( okay enough of pw. :(

went out with jiayi sharon jiayuan today. :D it's nice to spend time with them, very comfortable and happy happy. got jiayi and jiayuan their belated birthday presents, super super broke and had like zero money to pay for anything. okay next week will be better. i need to go and work! cash$$$$$$$ :) oh oh met some people in town too yeah hwach people woo. okay.

my old/new house is pretty much cleaned and painted and everything, furniture's coming in either thur or friday woo happy. i like new stuff hahaha. and i will enjoy having my own rooom. but im really really lazy to pack my stufffff :( everything's still like in a big mess or alot of small messes all around me i dont know where to start ahh and i keep procastinating. welll. anyway my grandmother has been really nice to us these days and i feel kinda bad for leaving her all alone now ahhhhhhhhhhhh :( and i didnt know that i will really miss her quite a bit. i thought i used to really dislike her and everything :( i feel so bad. im such a bad bad bad granddaughter. AHH. and i decided that it will be quite weird to come back here next time on saturdays probably as a grandma's house after living in here for the past 5 years. :x aiya sian la why is life so complicated :( okay still happy about moving back. :)

anyway the song the potential breakup song is like about breaking up and yet it sounds quite happy and relaxed, haha to me at least. haha its quite ironic but it's a very nice song, stuck in my head this whole afternoon. :)

i really want my brother to be more obedient, and more good in a sense if you know what im talking about. tmr is his science paper and today i was like going through a science paper with him (which he failed the prev time) and he actually could answer many of the questions which he couldnt the first time round and i'm really proud of him, i hope he does okay tmr. :) he aint dumb or anything, maybe it's that that pains me more, he's smart and everything but he doesnt use his intelligence in the right way. today his sch counsellor asked me, "if he didnt change to become so rebellious and everything, would he be doing well today" i nodded my head straight away its like a definite kinda thing i always know he's smart. and the counsellor said he's looking for friends, for companions and all and it doesnt really help that both of his siblings at home are girlssss we dont really relate to him the way we should. and one thing she said to my sister and i that made me really really sad, "your brother is putting on a front, on the outside he seems like everything's okay and he doesnt do well in his studies, he says who cares? but on the inside he actually wishes that he could do as well as the two of you." i wanted to die. yeah im in a good school but im not actually like DOING WELL but it doesnt matter. the thing is i never knew that my brother actually LOOKS UP TO ME. i should have done so many things which i didnt do right from the start. oh my god im such a bad bad bad sister :'( i love him alot, really<3